Monday, September 04, 2006

Would blog more, but hormonally impaired

That is, I'm ready to kick your ass if you provoke me! Grr!

Damn female stuff. Knocks a day or two out of you each month, but this month seems especially severe. I almost had it out with a city bitch in the local general store, after she came in demanding who had the blue van blocking the gas pump. I not-so-quietly informed her that my husband was out there, not finishing pumping gas, and that he was the type that would move it one second after the gas nozzle was put back. The owner of the store, sort of a friend, backed me up with "he's still pumping gas, ma'am!" I was shaking mad. The world does not start and stop at your convenience, ma'am.

That, and my youngest offspring was provoking me to the fullest. I really feel bad after one of the episodes where I feel the complete and total need to strangle him. I love him, dammit, but I won't put up with the worst he has to offer.

It got worse, after mandatory visits to Kohls and the dreaded Wal Mart to by school clothes and supplies. I was disappointed by Kohls, and their presumption that every preteen female figure is the same shape, skinny and tall. My daughter, while not fat, fits into size 10 regular although they are generally long. And their junior department...I'm not going to let her shop there....

Worse yet after Wal Mart, where they had run out of plain pencils and 24 pack Crayolas. This was a Super Wal Mart, mind you. I informed my children we would not be buying substitutes, that I would go to the local Ben Franklin and get what they needed. Hallelujah, I hate Wally Hell.

Fortunately, we made my usual run across the Bong Bridge (nice name) to a liquor store in Superior, Wisconsin known for their low prices. That kept me from going over the edge.

Arrgghh, I'm still not normal, and my kids are going back to school tomorrow, and dammit, where has the summer gone, why don't I seem to have the time to do what I really want to, and does my youngest really think I'm nothing but a pushover, or a hardass, why would he act that way just for me?

Ahhh, it too will pass. Maybe.


madcapmum said...

Whadya know, Deb, we're synchronized! ;-)

It does get better with the "intense" child thing, but it's pretty exhausting all the same - don't I know it, sister! Still, it's easier to handle at a decade than at four or five. Or so it seems today. Ask me again tomorrow.

I LOVE the "Bong Bridge"!

Deb said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you dear Madcapmum, just what I desperately needed to hear! I know I'm going crazy, just needed to hear I'm not alone!

pablo said...

Blogs are useful in so many ways.

the dharma bum said...

Well, I'm afraid there's only so much I can relate to with this post, but I can say I'm sorry to hear you had such a crappy day... And note a nice and very subtle Big Lebowski reference. :)

Happy September.

Prairie Chick said...

Must of been the Shack!? Wonderful place- use to be "MY" place to shop!

Deb said...

pablo- keeping myself honest is one of them!

dharma bum- thanks. One of the marks of a great movie is its ability to work its way into your subconscious. That was not a memorable line in itself, but it was the first thing that sprang into my mind at the time!

Prairie Chick- The Shack rules! My husband and kids joke about getting a room at the Best Western Inn about a block from there just so Mommy can be close to her favorite store. :) They have everything, and much cheaper than you can get it at any of the local liquor stores.

I'm feeling calmer today (for the dharma bum--"I'm calmer than you are!") but still no... ummm... resolution.

Floridacracker said...

(tiptoeing quietly past this blog...)

Deb said...

FC- I don't blame you one bit! But, if you were to show up around here, bring me chocolate and I may be okay. :)