Sunday, November 18, 2007

uncertainty

So, despite the optimism I have presented in the last couple of posts, we really don't know what is going on. We are going in for an MRI tomorrow, which may explain some things.

He is still very weak on his right side. Speech, though better, is not 100%.

I have not had an easy weekend. Besides getting through daily life, I have been wondering on all sorts of outcomes. But, I always come out with this easy feeling that, no matter what, we will get through this. Although I practically had a nervous breakdown last night, and I've hardly eaten for 2 days. I did have a good talk with the kids, who were understandably nervous about why Daddy isn't the way he usually is.

My stepson and his girlfriend and her 8 year old son came today to pick up a load of wood and stack it and help with the animal chores. I love them. They were making some jokes about D (her son) maybe having to buy beer someday for his uncle (Mr. Attitude, who is almost 6). The fact that that is being talked about blows my mind. But, everyone is way concerned about their Dad.

13 comments:

Lynne said...

Hang on Deb. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you all. We're all thinking of you here in New Hope.

gtr said...

Indeed! Try to take time to eat and breathe and take care of yourself, too. Do let us know if there's anything we can do.

Best wishes and good healing energy to you all!

barefoot gardener said...

I am hoping everything turns out the best it can. I agree with Lynne, let us know if there is anything we can do.

Hang in there!

denise said...

Just keep looking forward and take it one small step at a time. There are many people sending good thoughts your way. Oh! Remember to breathe! And eat something. You will be of no good to anyone if you get sick. Can't afford that now. All my best thoughts to you and your family.

RuthieJ said...

Aw Deb, that's so tough--especially for the kids. I suppose The Hermit is totally frustrated with everything too? I will continue to keep your family in my prayers. Take care of yourself also!

Jane said...

I am thinking and praying for your family. Trust that easy feeling.

arcolaura said...

Not knowing is so hard. Do eat, breathe, and I think some music might be a good idea, too, difficult though it might be to get started. I'll get started on my neglected guitar work here, and I'll be thinking of you. "One Bright Star" is on my practice agenda.

dharma bum said...

Deb - Katie and I are both thinking of you and your family and wishing for the best.

momadness said...

Hang in there Deb; I know it's rough, but you'll get through this. All my best.

Katie said...

Sending hugs and positive thoughts your way.

creeker said...

I've been lurking on your blog for about a year and it seems like a good time to drop in. Sending good thoughts and all hope for positive outcomes your way. If it is lyme, it can be managed. (my partner is 20 years into late stage lyme management and lives a very normal life).

Deb said...

Thanks all...sorry I can't reply individually. I have the best Web family there is! :)

Although, I have to welcome Creeker. Thanks for de-lurking. Late stage Lyme does exist, despite what doctors say.

We went in for the MRI today, his doc says he won't see the results for a couple of days...which naturally is frustrating, but he was so frustrated he was demanding to go to the ER in Duluth tonight. Hard to deal with, I had to turn away church members at the driveway who were ready to take him there. Even though we're not devout church members. Sigh. And the lunch lady from hell... Mr. Attitude and Starflower were denied hot lunch today. Just because they hadn't received a lunch money check.

I sent the lunch lady a very stinky email about our family situation the last week and I will send a check with the kids tomorrow but hey can't she cut someone some slack? I hope she feels like shit when she reads my email. I really hope she feels like shit. And I hope she credits S and Mr. A. for a lunch. this is unbelievable.

Deb said...

Oh, and Arcolaura- the only time I felt totally calm on Saturday was when I was playing my banjo. Steve Martin had a comedy line about that once, how if Richard Nixon had had a banjo everything would have been okay. I think the banjo does have some therapeutic effects.